Current song playing: Coldplay- Lost!

"Just because I'm hurting,

Doesn't mean I'm hurt,

Doesn't mean I didn't get what I deserved,

No better than the worst,

I just got lost,

At every river that I tried to cross,

And every door I ever tried was locked,

Oh and I'm just waiting 'till the shine wears off"

I don't think I've used that song before, apologies if I already have.

You know, I've been thinking *groans from the audience, odd one or two walks out*, and rather spontaneously I managed to find a rather good analogy for how I deal with life. Maybe my humble abode of readers may like it too.

Think of my life as driving a rally course at full speed with an arm tied behind your back, sounds bizarre I know I thought so too but bear with me.

Said tie I believe is this faulty circuit of a mind that I have, a sort of limiting factor perhaps, useful for something but not always the best thing to have in important situations such as the rally course. Onlookers will be amazed as the sheer audacity of it, maybe get the wrong impression and see it as a daft search for attention and nothing will ever be achieved through it so they pass the driver by.

So because of the limiting factor I have to drive slow I guess, so that I can make sense of my surroundings and prepare myself for the onslaught of hazards being thrown my way one after another they come. I have to drive slow not only due to the course's hazards but so I can protect my co-driver. Everything and everyone that is important to me, my guiding light who without would leave me a hapless and hopeless wreck. Of course I have to drive slow for them, if I didn't all I'd do is cause them harm, lose tham and ruin the course for all the recklessness things I've done, and where would that get me?

But then again, my co-driver spurs me on, "go faster, we can win this!" they say, I have faith in them but I can't bring myself to speed up. What if I lose control? If I go too fast I'll lose everything, but if I go too slow I'd be letting them down and I wouldn't be able to make something of myself. And so this leaves me confused, stuck between two conflicting characteristics. The racer, or the cruiser?

So here I am, at the start line once again, can I grow so that I can break free to the ties holding me back or will I just lose all drive?

The start lights are counting down...